I know a lot of us are struggling right now. It has been a tough year for everyone and harder for some than others. At times I have found myself riding the waves like a competent body surfer, whilst at other times feeling like someone has just pushed me overboard.
I am no stranger to anxiety, but it has been a long while since I have had an ‘episode’. However, this week it came knocking at my door and it was a shock. I felt the fear enter my life again, but somehow, I knew I would be ok, because motherhood has changed me.
I often talk about the struggles and challenges I have faced and continue to. But Aren has also changed me for the better. He brought me out of myself and I pull myself up because my little man needs me, and that brings me strength, as well as a huge loving heart!
So today as I sit here, I just feel like I am encompassing the very emotions I have felt of recent times, minus the anger. Sorrow, longing, anxiousness, exhaustion, hope, love, and gratitude. But most of all a feeling of being present. It’s a mixture of pain and comfort. And its ok. Because if Aren taught me anything, it is that things change, feelings pass, and all that we have is this moment.